HOW TO MARRY FOR LOVE? How to help a woman? Marry her! And now we will simply, naturally open not the creaking, but the melodious door of the topic of our conversation about joy. Of course, the themes of relationships between men and women. Some girls' eyes become sad, but why? A man doesn't have to wait. He is in business, always on horseback. He hasn’t yet called you with the magical name “beloved,” and you are sad. Better do it this way. Go outside at night, look at the starry sky, choose a star and call it by his name and now wait for him in the sky. By the way, there are still so many stars there! If he needs you, he will break through any obstacles to you. And if you need him, well, that’s love, identify yourself, say what you want, paint a picture of joy together. He will believe and feel that this is true, then you give him the right to make all other decisions. Your control and independence are hidden in the closet. You won’t buy wedding rings for yourself and for him? In one film, a woman sits, stroking her beloved, and he lies and whispers: “I wish I had a horse, a horse...” A man lives for the sake of an idea. For him, the joy of life is struggle! Read the poems of Vladimir Vysotsky, and you will understand how the male half of humanity lives: they live with an idea! A man is interested in the world, he is busy, he has his own affairs, his own plans, and here you are! You want to wear a white dress! Everyone dreams about this, and that’s good... I can give advice on what to do to make sure everything works out. A lonely lady should always wear glass slippers and be ready. She stumbled, what if someone raises her hand, and it’s advisable not to run away far after this incident, but, by chance, straighten her hair, which is already spring, and say: “By the way, I’m single, and I really want to get married... “Here is the recipe. Wrong? What to pull? Wait until, in his search for his beloved, he tries on the glass slipper and settles on some blonde? And you’re a brunette, so it’s better to get out of the heat and get married right away. Don’t you want to? Catastrophic coquetry should help! How? Reinforce his desire: “I like men who drink full and don’t snack.” And here it is yours! Wrong again? Don’t be afraid, you must be a princess. I advise you, dear ladies, to buy and read Andre Maurois’s book “Letters to a Stranger.” Why? Every girl or woman has a dream, but this is how it is presented on modern bookstores: “How to get married?”, “How to find a millionaire?”, “The Art of a Mistress” and the like. Do you think these titles expose us all? What opinion do the stronger sex have about us? Scary!? “They just want from us...” And the men shy away and worry. Don’t despair. I want to return to the topic of sincerity. From Andre Maurois: “You are sitting in front, wrapped in arctic fox furs, and, as during Musset, the selected “black braid on a marvelous flexible neck” swayed in front of me. During the intermission, you leaned over to your friend and asked animatedly: “How to become loved?” Say, dear accomplices of a wonderful deed, the word “love.” In your opinion, the expression “How to become loved?” different from How to Get Married? Yes! Read the book by A. Maurois, in it the author writes with respect for us and with respect for our desire to be loved! I will now tell you a whole scheme of what you need to do to find it. One woman asked: “Finding is not the worst thing, but how to live together?” I will answer this question a little later, in the next chapter. You need to prepare yourself to meet your lover and understand what kind of person you need. A woman chooses a man. Choose wisely! Who do you want to watch sunrises and sunsets with? So you met, and he invited you to meet, invited you on a date, and suddenly “something happened to him.” You are left at home alone. Are you sad? What if your wonderful friend changes his mind? Justify, maybe he is saving humanity. Treat it with a sense of humor, as they say, it’s better now than to be afraid before the altar. Tell him about your feelings: “I was sad, I cried...” Figure out how you can relax yourself...urgently several options for each finger of the right hand. You can tell fortunes with a daisy: he loves - he doesn’t love, he spits - he kisses, he presses him to his heart, he calls him yours, he sends him far, he loves sincerely, he mocks, he expects reciprocity, it’s better to eat.” Determine his place in your life. He is still far from you. Let the relationship mature, and sit in the front row of your life so that you can hear and see everything. The main thing is to respect the person’s decision!!! He decided to do so, it is his right!!! Evgeniy Schwartz’s play “An Ordinary Miracle” is wonderful. In it, the wizard warned the young man that if he kissed the princess, he would turn into a bear. This is where it all comes down to. Why "Ordinary Miracle"? Yes, because whenever a woman lets a man come close to her and kisses him, he inevitably turns into a bear and runs away into the forest. And that's okay! But if he stays, walks with his beloved hand in hand, calls her by name, this is called an ordinary miracle or simply love. Where is she? Remember in A. S. Pushkin’s novel “Eugene Onegin”? Tatyana fell in love with Onegin and writes him a letter: I am writing to you - what more? What else can I say? Now I know that it is in your will to punish me with contempt... And what did Onegin do? He came to her immediately. And he said a lot of words to Tatyana, but we need to write his main sentence with a red marker on the wallpaper of his memory, he asked her “Know how to control yourself.” I ask one lady: “What will your future husband be like?” She replies: “With a car, with an apartment.” Then, embarrassed by my surprised look, she began to come up with a set of qualities of a person who was already lost in space. If you haven’t come up with and definitely haven’t imagined your lover, then you will get a man worthy of you. “For every creature there is a pair,” says Scripture. Quickly form a harmonious mood in yourself, work on your image, your interests. Dear women, to be honest, we are sufferers. After all, today there are many older women who still want to meet their soulmate or live with their husbands, “distorting” each other. In order for family well-being to appear in a young family and persist throughout life, girls need to be raised correctly: a woman dissolves in her husband. He is the guide, the head of the family. I know that now a barrage of female dissent may fall on me. This is our pain, our stupidity! I have often observed situations where a “negligent husband” and one wife could barely make ends meet. Then he finally broke free, and everything went well with the other woman. I’ll give you an Avar toast from the poetess Faza Aliyeva. This is where a woman’s upbringing is! So they say: “The husband is one.” And “Zero is the wife,” - so they say. Everything can change from the moment two numbers become in a row. When a wife comes to the house, the Bride with tact and guesswork, - She - behind the husband, becoming a zero - The wife makes a ten. And the stupid wife, before her husband, becomes a zero. And the counting goes the other way around, And the result, of course, is worse. I drink so that with a good meaning, the Wife, sharing life with her husband, Leads him to high numbers ,But didn’t reduce it to zero. A woman “leads” her husband, she lets him rise, she doesn’t drown him. I like the Caucasus. The woman there is a flower, but I haven’t seen weak women. Stop your aggression towards men. Stop it! A woman will find her lover, will be able to live with him, when she thinks and behaves like a TRUE WOMAN. Continue to the next chapter, “How to Live Joyfully with Your Husband.” School of Wives." When a woman behaves correctly, she dissolves in her lover, knows how to be a true wife, and he will never hurt his half. Don’t even argue! Happy is the girl who didn’t plan, didn’t know, but met her first love at school, college, etc., got married and lives until she turns gray. My good friend told me that her husband wrote letters to her from the army and signed them “Your beloved Seryozha,” and she always cheerfully remarked: “I never wrote “Loving husband Seryozha.” Today they live in family well-being, and everything that was bad is forgotten, erased to pieces. Learn to leadbehave worthy, beautiful, think correctly. Teach your daughters! Fairy tale characters allow children to experience gender roles that are emotionally attractive and socially significant. The fairy tale, among other things, is full of vivid examples of decent sexual behavior. The prince is brave and courteous, Ivan Tsarevich is kind and courageous. Vasilisa the Beautiful is certainly beautiful and humble, and Vasilisa the Wise is shrewd and prudent. The Pushkin princess in the scene of the meeting with the heroes, going down to them from the upper room, gives an example of truly feminine charm: And the princess came down to them, gave honor to the owners, bowed low to the waist; Blushing, she apologized, That she had come to visit them, Even though she had been invited she wasn’t. Instantly, by her speech, they recognized that they were receiving the princess... It wasn’t by her clothes and jewelry that the heroes guessed that the princess was in front of them, but by the way the girl carried herself, what and how she said. This is how, listening to a fairy tale, every girl forms her own princess within herself, who respects men. Behave with dignity! And respect a man! There are different women who consciously or unconsciously play different roles: daughters, queens, seductresses, girlfriends, bosses, mothers, housewives... Which role should you take to be sure to get a check for “Lifetime Favorite”? Because of these games, the rotation of the globe has already slowed down and global warming is approaching. No need to play. The best manipulation is sincerity. Be real! From consulting practice, I realized that these numerous roles a woman has remain from the problems she experienced in life or the joys she had with her parents. But you need to educate yourself! If you see that your role as a seductress has gone far, everyone is already shying away from your courage and fun - think about it! Or this: you are a woman over thirty, but if you still pout and ask your beloved: “Do you love me?” several times a day, playing the role of a child, then it’s time for you to go to the mirror and work on your manners - you are no longer a princess, but a queen. You can play different images. Let's say a girl who has everything, but is ready to consider offers. Knowing the price and ready for a miracle at any moment. But all this is a game, the goal of which is to receive, not to give. You can be natural to the point of disgrace, but it’s better to follow the internal rules, understand that the main thing is not to get, but to start living harmoniously! And let me remind you once again: you don’t have to change anything, stay in the image that is familiar to you, your man will like you like that , but... the search process may take a long time. For what? Feel for yourself what your behavior is hindering you, and what character traits are helping. Just no self-criticism or self-flagellation. Like in a fairy tale... The little fox runs away from the hunters, hid in a hole and asks her paws: “Little paws, what were you doing when I was running away from the hunters?” “We, Little Fox, helped you, all four of us.” “Ears, what were you doing?” - Little Fox, we listened to see if they were far away or close. - Nose, and you? - Oh, yes, I, Little Fox, was completely attentive. - Little Fox, and you? - I, Fox, got in the way between my legs, clinging to the ground. - Oh, that's what you are! Let the hunters teach you a lesson. The fox stuck its tail out of the hole... Be careful with all your baggage of habits, characteristics, images. Educate yourself, and don’t play roles by changing dresses. Read fiction, watch good films, think well about people more often - and you yourself will naturally tune in to the wavelength you need. I had such a case during the training. A pretty girl came to study. I admired her: beautiful hair, chiseled figure, pleasant voice. It was immediately clear to me that she wanted to get married. In the group there are two handsome, smart guys who openly said that they are looking for their soul mate. And what? This girl showed all her “agility”: she demonstrated her independence in every possible way. And the boys, who initially showed interest in her, calmed down by the end of the training. I was very sorry. A month later, I invite this girl again to the training and say that there will be excellent guys in the group, and frankly reprimand her that she should not overplay her independence,This is not a plus for you, you need to be a real woman. And suddenly she quite sincerely answers: “I wanted the best, because I was at school, I thought that this is how you have to behave here. If those guys are in class, I’ll improve...” Of course, I told her everything I thought about her ideas! And I'll tell you! Girls, women, wherever you are, your future family happiness can “lurk in wait” for you. Be ready! Under no circumstances should you show off your independence and efficiency; you are not looking for a mutant, but a man. A real man needs a meek, cheerful, smart, hard-working wife. Did you write it down? Did you underline it with a pencil? He will come up to you, perhaps immediately deciding that you will not get away from him now, maybe you will make such a decision, and how things will end will not be immediately clear. But! You are harmonious, you know your calling, you want to live in family well-being, you are working on your character and your manners, you are true, beloved... He will see and feel it. And even if your paths diverge, he will respectfully look after you, and you will respectfully turn around to wave goodbye to him. Now it’s time to introduce your beloved. We will look at the “clean slate” option. Advice about “capturing” is not for me. One lady during a consultation said: “I love a married man, but here my wife gets in the way. How to capture? Don't touch other people's lives! And even later I will give advice to wives on how to “break up” with their husband’s mistresses. Girls, don’t persist and leave family strangers alone. I assure you, a man, if he can no longer tolerate his wife’s nonsense, will leave on his own, preferably without your help. I had one student imbued with my instructions. Her rival - the wife of her lover - calls her, makes a scandal, and she begins to teach her how to behave in order to get her husband back. Let me better tell you how to behave in such a way that you get married and build your happiness not on the ashes and not on someone else's grief. You have become harmonious, you understand your calling as a woman, you agree with it, strive for family well-being... Now describe it! What is he like? Most importantly, don't forget about the details. If you write that he is generous, what does that mean? Do you agree that he will give away everything he has acquired? For me, generosity is when a man gives on time, knows how to give gifts and enjoys it himself. Honest - what does that mean? Will he truthfully tell you how he spent the evening without you? One smart woman wished that her chosen one would want and be able to earn money for her. Of course, besides this there were other wishes. This is what she found. At first they had nothing... cars and apartments were sold to pay off debts from their past life. Today, in “silks and velvet”, she is loved, unique, harmonious, cheerful. Write what qualities let your loved one have, what if you forget one quality? Carefully! Otherwise you will be left with nothing. Remember A.S. Pushkin's fairy tale about the goldfish? The old woman asked the goldfish to fulfill all her wishes, but she was not satisfied with what she received, she wanted more and more. So what? The fish said nothing, just waved its tail and went off into the blue sea. A girl came to me for counseling and said: “I can’t live with my husband anymore.” It turns out that she dreamed of marrying a scientist and living in joy. And my husband, a senior researcher at the university, was so carried away by his discovery that he stopped bringing money into the house. He began to frantically conduct experiments. He let his beard grow and said that he would not shave it off until the hour came for his idea to be recognized. That's it! I tell her: “Maybe your husband is a genius, maybe he will make a discovery that will save humanity. You yourself wanted a scientist, why didn’t you describe that he had no beard?” This is, of course, no longer a joke. It is impossible to predict everything. I will say one thing: we are responsible for our dreams, for our words, for our behavior and for our choices. Otherwise you will rush from one desire to another, and the fish will not say anything to you, but will only wave its tail and go into the blue-blue sea... Yes? I ask the girl: “Do you want to meet your man? What will he be like? And she answered: “I havemy heart will feel that he is mine.” You and I know that it’s a joy to live not with a smart, handsome, kind, rich, brave person, but with a loved one, dear and one and only. You can do this: put on glasses with clear parameters and, like a robot, say: “I see an object.” Take off your glasses and get acquainted! I want to warn you in advance. Today, dating scenarios are unfolding quickly. Today they met, the next day they were already sexual partners, and the day after tomorrow they didn’t suit each other - well, it didn’t work! It also happens - they met and realized that living together is not boring. Do you remember the film “The Marriage of Balzaminov” directed by K. Voinov, when Balzaminov ends up in the courtyard of a portly merchant’s wife? She asks him: “What are you doing?” He answers: “Nothing, sir.” She continues: “I am nothing. It’s boring to do nothing alone, but it’s more fun together.” At the end of the film they got married. If you decide to live as cohabitants, be patient: the wedding will not happen soon. Can you tell me cases when they lived for a month and got married? I'll be happy. And this happens in life. But it happens that a partner moves from one “merchant’s wife” to another. It happens that girls, in search of happiness, easily change their place of residence. But no one has yet canceled human affection, and pain and resentment follow on the heels of such “wanderers” or breed cynicism and confusion. I will say one thing: until he himself calls you his wife, you are nobody! “Beloved”, “the only one”, but... he may not take responsibility. And don’t be too persistent - you won’t be nice by force. There is one more suggestion - give birth. I don’t know what you are capable of. Simple advice - a husband who gave his word to take care of you before the altar, you are a promise to him to be together, to give him the happiness of family life - this is sacred, this is true, and the rest is tricks. True, depending on your luck. There is often a lot of uncertainty in such a game. It’s good when parents intervene and say: “Are you going to live like this for a long time and make good money?” Or friends ask honestly, openly: “When?” Marriage is real work on yourself, not on him. Are you ready? I have collected enough cases where a woman, after several years of marriage, files for divorce and soon finds her soul mate! You will be happy in your new marriage if the divorce goes smoothly for both you and him and leaves neither of you with any grievances or complaints. If, nevertheless, with this baggage you go out onto the road of a new life, then your “new guy” will be very similar to the “old one”, and your upbringing or trials will continue. “Wife” is a sacred word. They take care of their wife and live with their partner. Of course, if you live with a sponsor, then play “beautiful wife” for money. Your decision. If in your life there have been cases when people lived happily ever after, but never made it to the registry office, very good... Only I didn’t interview these comrades, and I didn’t collect the woman’s tears in a jar. A man cares about his wife, he wants to see her eyes happy, he pleases her with the words: “Be my wife.” What is all this about?.. Don’t rush to become cohabitants, it would be better... if... you were lucky... and you... would immediately... truly... become husband and wife. Yes? An important role in a daughter’s happiness is played by the relationship between her parents – quarrels, scandals, insults or calm, harmony, respect. Of course, the relationship between parents and daughter. If the mother is divorced and the child lives with the idea that the father abandoned them and does not love them, this is a disaster. Remember the song based on the verses of N. Dorizo, when a woman knits a jacket for her son and gives it to him, as if it were a gift from his father, with the words: Don’t think bad about him, When you grow up, you will understand everything yourself over the years. Your father loves you and remembers you, Even though she hasn’t lived with us for a long time. Happy is the girl who is surrounded by her dad’s love. The father should not be strict with her, let him pamper her, make her happy, then everything will go well for the girl in her personal life. Let him treat his mother with love, and let the mother explain to the girl what kind of example a woman in the family should set. An ideal situation! A woman’s problems in her personal life begin if she is offended by her parents, especially by her father - he loved little, offendedmother. Do you want to improve your personal life? Forgive your parents for everything, agree with everything! You can mentally, in a whisper. Say the magic words: “Thank you for everything you have given me... for life. Forgive me, and I forgive you. Take care of yourself. I'm proud to be your daughter." Many ladies don't want to talk like that. Well, okay, their process of becoming a true woman will be lengthened - it’s up to them. Thanks to the mothers who believe in the happiness of their daughters, they have no doubt, then everything goes uphill for the children. Mother and daughter are friends. Example. A woman, about sixty years old, asks me to help her. Problems with my daughter. They live together, and the daughter communicates rudely with her. Sad. I ask: “How old is your daughter?” “Twenty-eight.” “Single?” “Yes, it won’t work.” (Do you feel the mother’s disbelief in her daughter’s happiness? She could answer: “I hope we’ll get married soon.”) – What are your complaints? – Let’s say my daughter comes in the evening, I ask her: “Where have you been?” and she: “It doesn’t matter.” Imagine that your daughter is your friend and she’s coming back from a date. How will you talk to her: irritably and instructively or sadly and sympathetically, or maybe you will just sleep peacefully and in the morning ask: “How are you?”? The obsessiveness of maternal love develops into the image of a creepy mother-in-law. And no family. Do you need this? If you are a mother, treat your daughter like a friend. Don't talk bad about your father. Wish her well in your head (not out loud) and live your life. And if you are a daughter who is faced with the problem of excessive guardianship or parental scandals, forgive everyone and do not let your parents into your space. At the same time, be sure to communicate, call, help, but carefully measure their influence on your personal life. A student gets ready to go home and says: “I try to come to my mother dressed neatly so that she can see that everything is fine with me.” I had a student whose mother called her twenty times during the day. What to do? Explain, talk. Mom doesn’t understand, tick away without looking back. Only politely. Don’t suffer because you lack your mother’s love, imagine that your mother is saying these words to you. Substitute your name into the text and place the note in a secluded place. And when doubts begin to overcome you whether your mother loves you, take it out and read it._______________, my beloved, Do not disturb yourself with sadness and melancholy. You are beautiful, there is no doubt about it, because you are a star! And you will remain so until old age! You are not old either be afraid, After all, she is not at all scary to you! If only life brings joy! So taste all the joys to the fullest!!! Your madly loving MOTHER. ___________________, my beloved! To be always desired and forever young... What is the magic and mystery? And the fact that this world is so big, And love will find you by chance, It will come unexpectedly, tenderness will not melt. And will not fade in its light your beauty. Kisses, MOTHER. Sometimes mothers are stingy with kind words, sometimes they are tired and worn out (and you give them this book to read). You shouldn’t say: “My mother will never say such kind words, but you won’t get it from her.” Are you all complaining again?! Don't be stubborn, it will cost you a lot. Write and that’s it! The most precious thing is a parent’s blessing. I like the fairy tale about Baba Yaga and Vasilisa the Beautiful. In a certain kingdom there lived a merchant. He lived in marriage for twelve years and had only one daughter, Vasilisa the Beautiful. When her mother died, the girl was eight years old. Dying, the merchant’s wife called her daughter to her, took out a doll from under the blanket, gave it to her and said: “Listen, Vasilisa! Remember and fulfill my last words. I’m dying and, together with my parent’s blessing, I’m leaving you this doll; take care of it, always keep it with you and don’t show it to anyone; and when some misfortune befalls you, give her something to eat and ask her for advice. She will eat and tell you how to help the misfortune.” The mother kissed her daughter and died. The doll helped Vasilisa free herself from Baba Yaga, who gave impossible tasks to Vasilisa, and the doll did everything. “How do you manage everything?” - asked the old woman. “My mother’s blessing helps me,” Vasilisa answered. “So that's it! Get away from meblessed daughter! I don’t need the blessed ones.” And she released Vasilisa from captivity. The doll tells Vasilisa how to find her lover. And of course, Vasilisa married the Tsar. May maternal love be a positive and indestructible image for you. Even if your mother behaves persistently and strictly, as it seems to you, indifferently, maybe even scares you that she will not forgive you for something like that... - she is your mother. Don't get involved in the showdown. Smile and say: “You are the best!” without conclusions or explanations and live your life. She gave birth to you, was there a father? All! Thanks everyone... How can I help? I love... I respect... Learn to be wise and protect yourself from pressure. Extra care - when you don’t ask for advice, but you’ve already been told everything. The doll in the fairy tale came to the rescue only at Vasilisa’s request. Of course, sometimes you need to help without waiting to be asked, but what if this initiative happens several times a day? By the way, Ham was the name of a man who offended his parents. Be wise parents, be caring children! The personal happiness of everyone depends on this! Next, ladies and gentlemen, we close our mouths. Don’t brag about your loved one, don’t tell anyone – then write it in your memoirs. You want to ask: “And to your friends?” Especially to my friends! Imagine you and your beloved friend went to a cafe and suddenly meet a guy you both liked. Will you step aside or trust the decision of the young man? It happens that friends with friendly curiosity ask you to tell about your new adventures, and you excitedly, sincerely, lay out everything as best you can. What, they don’t envy you, they are sincerely happy for you? Are you sure about that? Well, in vain! You can start a dialogue with a friend with the following phrase: “Do you want to pass the test with a hot iron? My beloved gave me a diamond ring.” The best friend is not the one who “listens and doesn’t eat anything at this time,” but the one who is interested in your happiness, introduces you to someone, says only good things about you, praises you in front of him and them. Are there any? I don’t argue, I’m glad that this is possible, most often at a great distance. The main thing is to respect men, read them. Respect for a man - no discussion! Please note: in the Christian church, men come up to communion first; no matter what the woman is, she stands in line behind the man’s back. The child was born, a boy, he hasn’t done anything yet to respect him, but we respect him! Because he is a future man! There are no good or bad people, there are people who are suitable or not suitable for each other. Let's say you met and feel that he is not the one. So why cynically say offensive words, assessing him “on his merits.” With every aggressive remark towards a man, you push back the fulfillment of your dreams, but you dream of getting married? Finding a sponsor is not my thing. Men have knowledge that we don’t have, even if this “stronger sex” is lying on the bench completely drunk. Here’s a case: I’m leaving the store, the bags are heavy and I’m muttering under my breath some words of support or disappointment. There’s a drunk man standing there, well, to be honest, very drunk, looking at me and so calmly saying: “What, are you tired? Upset? Everything will pass...” That is, he speaks to me in the words of King Solomon. Remember? “Everything will pass” And on the back of the king’s ring there was another inscription: “And this will pass...” You want to say: “Oh, how touching. Yes they... Yes we...” And it seems to me that you heard me that the voice is an expression of our goodness, our independence, our soul, our beauty. Let the world admire you! And everything depends on our hard work, dear ladies! The sparkle in the eyes, the graceful gait are complemented by a beautiful-sounding speech, restrained and resourceful, delicate and exciting, feminine and regal. Take action! You work with your character, you know what kind of wife you need to be, you have forgiven your parents, even if they didn’t quarrel, you honor and love them, you know what your spouse will be like. The next no less important point is where and how can you meet your future husband? Internet! Post your photos. How manycases when they find classmates and find out that they have been loved for a long time. At work - look, perhaps your dear one is nearby. Tell your acquaintances and friends about your decision, but you don’t need to remind them about it every day. Hobbies. Get involved in hockey, volleyball, diving - where there are a lot of men. You can become a hairdresser - a men's master. Traveling is the most important point! Bring your beauty to people! Remember why they paid attention to the new kids at school? And no matter how she was - small, frail, with glasses, with thin pigtails, she was NEW, and everyone looked at her with interest. And now you are a new woman, and the world is admiring you! You understand: no matter what happens, no matter when you meet your destiny, you need to live without complaints. "Like this? I do everything, I’m so good, I’ve already forgiven my parents, but I can’t find him! Why?" You accept the situation, search, live, trust in fate, you have already done a good job! One lady sincerely said: “At least when!” and met him a day later. You need to learn to be true, real, harmonious, understand what he will be like, and live! “Everything is for you,” YOUR man will say one day. Be calm. Remember the movie “Morozko” directed by Alexander Rowe, when the stepmother sent her stepdaughter into the forest. And now the girl is sitting under a tree, freezing. Santa Claus comes up to her and says, “Are you warm, little girl, are you warm, red one?” and she replies, “Warm, father.” He completely froze her, and she repeated: “It’s warm...”. The grandfather saw the girl’s humility and good disposition and took her to his mansion, and then sent her home and gave her a dowry. The stepmother saw that the princess’s little daughter had returned and gathered her Marfusha into the forest. And so the girl sits under a tree, eats pies, and Grandfather Frost asks her: “Are you warm, girl, are you warm, red one?” Marfusha took Santa Claus by the chest, shook him and shouted: “Can’t you see, old man, that I’m chilled, well, give me a groom and a dowry, and more!” And what? Her grandfather immediately sent her home in a trio of pigs. My mother told me as a child: “Yulechka, this girl who played the stepdaughter married an astronaut.” Don’t shake your fate by the breasts... Be meek, cheerful, hard-working, and everything will come. Don’t say the word “I love” in vain. Do you like it? Are you ready to give your life? Jack London in his story “Smoke Bellew” described the love feelings between the characters Smoke and Labiskwee. A short summary of their story. They went on a hike, there was not enough food, as a bag of flour was lost on the road. She secretly put aside food for him, pieces of her own. So, without eating herself, “she gave her life; she put her heart in his hands and opened his eyes to the secret, whose name is the soul of a woman.” The word “love” obliges! Listen to your heart, be real! When a relationship begins, don’t bend your heart, but don’t act out of your hand. Let your feelings sit. By loving, people change. Give time for the feelings of love to mature. Fairy tale. In a certain kingdom lived a king and a queen, and they had one son. The parents had a dream: to marry their son, but he didn’t even think about it, he went about his business: he hunted, had fun, studied various books. And then one day he got lost in the forest and came across a forester’s house. When he knocked, the door was opened for him by a girl of extraordinary beauty, meek and courteous. He immediately fell in love with her and began to go to the forester’s house more and more often, and then he announced to his parents that he had found his soul mate. The Queen was terribly upset, and this is what she came up with. She knew that what her son disliked most was the sight and smell of fresh fish. The queen ordered a dress to be made for her future daughter-in-law from fish scales, came to the forester's house and asked the girl to wear this dress. The servants smeared the dress with the mucus of fresh fish, it smelled, the mucus dripped, the scales pricked their hands. When the prince knocked on the door, a girl in this “outfit” appeared before him. The prince saw his beloved and realized that he was just... loves fresh fish! When you meet your man, do not take on the role of a teacher. After concentrating on re-reading the list of qualities thatIt should be, having found a discrepancy, rubbing your hands, do not say: “It’s okay, I’ll make a man out of you.” It's not funny anymore. Changing a man, raising him is dangerous! He may become uninteresting to you, because the feeling of respect will disappear forever... Changes in both of you will happen naturally, everything depends on mutual love and mutual respect. And remember: marriage is when one wants to sleep with the window open, and the other with the window closed. Fazil Iskander in the story “The Station of Man” makes the following remark regarding modern ideas about female dignity: “Given other conditions being equal and her own indifference, a woman from two admirers - a lover and not in love, always chooses not in love. Why? A lover causes shame, fear, anxiety. She knows that she does not have the temple that her lover sees in her, and the ritual of worship offends and irritates her. Why is it annoying? Because her lover reminds her that there could have been a temple in her, but either she destroyed it herself, or due to mediocrity she did not notice in time, and now it is dirty...” This is the man’s opinion. I don't agree with this. Why do we women like those who behave with dignity, even giving flowers without slaves, like a king? This is probably due to the fact that a woman chooses her soul mate. Ladies are not interested in a man who sings serenades, begs, or runs around. He loses his manhood. After all, does a man really need to persuade his soul mate and endure humiliation from her? Remember the poem by Robert Rozhdestvensky? – Should I give you my love? – Give it back! – It’s in the dirt... – Give it back in the mud!.. – I want to tell your fortune... – Guess. – I also want to ask... – Ask!.. – Let’s say I knock.. .– I’ll let you in!– Let’s say I call...– I’ll go!– What if there’s trouble there?– In trouble!– And if I deceive you?– I’ll forgive you!– Sing! – I’ll order you. – I’ll sing! – Lock the door for your friend... – I’ll lock it! – I’ll tell you: kill!.. – I’ll kill! – I’ll tell you: die!.. – I’ll die! – What if I choke? – I’ll save you! – A if there is pain?– I’ll endure it!– What if suddenly there’s a wall?– I’ll tear it down!– And if there’s a knot?– I’ll cut it!– And if there’s a hundred knots?– And a hundred!..– Should I give you love? – Love!.. – This won’t happen! – For what?! – Because I don’t like slaves. Give your chosen one the opportunity to perform feats for you. Help, rescue. Just don’t start “singing” about your independence, your independence makes me want to eat. It’s sad to look at the picture - the mother is carrying all the bags and is still holding her growing son by the hand. All by myself. Or the girl tells the guy: “I can handle it myself.” From which side should he approach you so that you say everything correctly? - Help? - I am sincerely grateful to you. It’s not difficult, is it? And please, don’t tell men the whole truth about yourself. Let’s say: “I think out loud, and I also argue. Forgive me, dear, that I mistook too many people for you.” My grandmother told an incident that happened in a military town where she and her husband lived. A neighbor came to her in the morning and was crying. “What is it?” “Today I had a dream, as if I was walking through the forest with a handsome young man, kissing. I opened my eyes and told my husband everything, so he started running after me around the garden. “Don’t you know that it is strictly not recommended for men to say half of what you want or can say.” Even if he caught you in bed with another man, you stand up and say: “Do you believe your eyes?” A smart woman knows how to watch her word. The word is not a sparrow - it will fly out and you won’t catch it. Behave like a queen, just don’t overplay your hand. Not arrogantly, pompously, imposingly, but with dignity, grace, politely, with respect, watching your words. It's like you're surrounded by journalists and foreign agents. I came across a talented poem on the Internet, it was signed: “Author unknown”: You know, beloved, I am a queen, From queens they don’t go to the left, From queens they only go forward, Either to the throne, or to the scaffold. You know, good one, I am your secret ,The secret, believe me, is not found by chance. You’re already thinking: “I’ve solved it!” But you only lifted one veil. You know, my dear, I am your meeting, Behind this meeting is heaven and eternity, Following them is the sea and stars, Is everything too complicated? - Allvery simple! Everything is very simple, but unique, I am your tenderness, you are my beloved, We are forever, without anxiety and anger, You are my king, and I am the queen! We all believe in something. I suggest, state your desires as a prayer and ask your mental Protector to help you! Let's say...Please straighten out all my wrinkles. Give me strength and patience to wait for the words “My beloved.” Dry my tears. Help my beloved find me and live with me happily ever after. Give me the opportunity to live in prosperity at sea with my beloved, with with our children and engage in creativity, write books, hold concerts, trainings, record cartoons, conduct dance classes. May happiness come to me, I will give birth to a healthy, beautiful child from my beloved. And we will have a friendly family. Let people call themselves my friends. Let my parents be healthy, so that they are of a sober mind and memory, walk, move on their own. May my children be lucky: they will find their soul mates. And they will have children who will honor and respect them. I ask you for everything and I don’t know where you are to reach out to you, but my heart is beating, which means life has been given to me and I have time. Give me the strength to wait and faith not to doubt what I want. Give me the strength to change what I can change. Give me patience to come to terms with what I cannot change. Give me the wisdom to distinguish the first from the second. Thank you! And your Protector answers you: “You will definitely be happy!” Do you agree that a woman is created for a family? Many women, when retiring, fall into a trance because they do not know how to live at home. And married women cope with the beginning of retirement more easily, they are not bored at home, they know how to live with their husbands... I hope. Act now! Otherwise, then it will be too late and everything will happen like in A.S. Pushkin’s fairy tale. A young guy offered love to the beautiful Naina, and she only answered him, “Hero, I don’t love you!” born of tender passion; Feelings have awakened, I am burning, I am languishing with the desires of love... Both were no longer happy about love - they are already old. Although they say “All ages are submissive to love,” you still start to live early, think correctly! Now I suggest you take a pen and a few sheets of blank paper and do a short exercise. Don’t ask: “Why?”, otherwise I will have to explain for a long time that such written exercises help you meet your lover faster. Write 10 qualities of character and appearance that you think can be considered a plus. Example: 1) sociable; 2) kind; 3) brave... Now define each word. Sociability is when a person can choose the right words to talk with another person and make a good impression on him. Kindness is helping people. Courage is a synonym for the word – desperation, i.e. the ability to sometimes commit rash acts, making instant decisions without thinking about the consequences. Now write what you don’t really like about yourself, and people have already told you about it. But write it as an action for improvement. For example, if you smoke, then “Quit smoking” is 10 points. Don’t be modest, be bold! For example: Quit smoking. Don’t shout. Watch your hair. Learn to straighten your back. Don’t brag. Tell stupid jokes less. Learn to cook. Clean your apartment more often. Don’t swear. Learn to sing. Now 10 qualities that will your future lover. Example: 1) courageous; 2) smart; 3) caring... Give a definition. Courage is when he said and did, independence in decision-making, a man of his word and “like behind a stone wall.” Intelligence is the ability to do the right thing solve the problem and at the same time do not boast about it. Caring is to show attention and understand what I need at this time. Write 10 sentences about yourself. Describe one happy day of your future family, down to the smallest detail: you can write down what kind of furniture, house will be... Everything... everything... everything! What words does he say, how the children laugh. Write what you will do for your husband - 10!