If you listen to psychologists, the word “responsibility” sounds like a refrain. The point is to learn to take your destiny into your own hands, direct it, making the necessary and sometimes painful conclusions. But why are people so often called to account? Does this mean that many people persistently avoid it? Yes, that's exactly what happens often. But why? Negative associations. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “responsibility”? Perhaps something from childhood. A small and helpless child surrounded by such large and important adults. First these are parents, then educators, teachers and so on. A stern look, glasses on his nose and a pointing finger - “you are to blame, you will answer for everything!” Guilt is an effective lever for social training. “Keep quiet - you’ll pass for smart,” “Keep your head down.” Thus, step by step, inquisitive spontaneity is driven into the Procrustean bed of social demands. Therefore, it is no wonder that among today’s adults, when they hear the word “responsibility,” a vague fear of being punished for something immediately emerges. For what exactly is unclear, but that doesn’t make it any easier. How to dispel fears? Having clearly realized: Responsibility is not equal to guilt. Life is not a rite of self-torture, and you are not a member of the Khlysty sect. Responsibility is not a masochistic 1001 way to punish yourself, to slap yourself on the cheeks, to put you in a corner and something else. What is the alternative then? Clear up semantic confusion. There is a wonderful expression: our shortcomings are extensions of our strengths. It so happens that perseverance turns into stubbornness, frugality into greed, and delicacy into infantilism. It seems like similar phenomena, having positive and negative poles. And if responsibility is associated with punishment, then you can find an analogue of this concept. In my opinion, psychologist Irvin Yalom proposed a good option - “authorship.” Semantically, the term is clearer, more transparent, and not aggressive. And what is important, authorship implies changes. Those that are close to each specific person. And since they are yours, they are unlikely to scare you. And changes are vitally necessary, because passivity, multiplied by unsatisfied desires, will most likely lead to deep disappointments. As the already mentioned I. Yalom said: “Hope is the worst of evils. She prolongs the pain».