From the author: The article was written for the project “I want to get married”: Psychological services are now extremely popular. Everywhere you look there is continuous advertising: “Come to the trainings..”, “Consultation with a psychologist...”, “after completing these trainings, you will become...”, “psychological fortune telling with Tarot cards...”. And even if you understand that counseling and training can seriously help in life, it is very difficult for you to determine where to go. There are so many offers that your eyes run wild, in any case you have to buy a “pig in a poke”, but how to choose what will really help is a big question. I will try to describe some criteria that will help you make your choice. Some you can use when choosing a specialist, some – during the work itself. If so, then you will already spend money for the first consultation, but then you will have the right to refuse low-quality services. 1. Education, certificates. Pay attention to the specialist's education. It is important that he has a higher education or professional retraining, because now “psychologists” are sometimes trained in three-month courses. Would you go for an operation with a surgeon who studied for only three months? Also pay attention to additional education - after all, universities often provide theoretical education, but not practical skills. 2. A contract is concluded for the work. In business, a contract is usually written; in personal psychology, it is concluded orally, and is not called by these words. This is the very goal (topic, problem) with which you are working, and the working conditions. They concern both formal things - time, money, and other conditions. The contract must be understandable to both the psychologist and the client. In this case, the specialist can impose restrictions on the client, including determining the frequency of visits. But you have the right to clarify why certain conditions are established. Also, after the first consultation, the specialist should describe to you how he sees your problem and offer an approximate way to solve it. 3. Setting specific goals. Goals for working with specialists should not be vague and general, but specific. After all, many correct phrases, such as “if you want to be happy, be happy” or “you need to love yourself” are not so easily applicable to everyday life. The fact that you need to love yourself is understandable, but for thousands of people it remains a mystery how to do it. Goals should be focused around reality. “Make life better” is too abstract, how can you then understand whether you have achieved the result? But “to improve relationships in the family” is more practical and tied to life. Of course, goals are discussed with a specialist and adjusted together. Typically, in decent personal training and counseling, goals are set. They are often revised during the process, especially at the first meeting. For example, the mother of a teenage girl came and started with her daughter’s problems at school, but it turned out that the main topic of the work was family relationships that put pressure on the child. But even despite the fact that the discussion turned to issues of eternal dissatisfaction with the daughter and conflicts between her and her stepfather, the issue of school at the request of the mother remained relevant - which means it needs to be worked on. And it is important that you understand what result you expect. In such an ambiguous sphere as the human soul, it is difficult to accurately define it, but still. The main thing is that you understand what you are going to, otherwise consultations with a psychologist may drag on and become just regular meetings for money. 4. Psychologists do not give advice. Clients regularly come for a panacea, advice that works without fail. Any self-respecting specialist will not give a clear answer on WHAT needs to be done. Not because he's so greedy. But only because there are no clear answers and cannot be, no matter how banal it may sound. No algorithm will make a person happy or save him from all problems. And only you can make the most suitable decision for you - a psychologist should help you with this. After all, he is also a person and can make mistakes..