The woman you want to “be with” is an adult woman. She respects family, friends, and a man’s interests. Such a woman does not play guessing games, but speaks openly about her desires , feelings, shares her thoughts. She allows herself to appear in different roles. An adult woman does not fight for power and does not seek to prove that she is right. She knows that mistakes are part of life. And she allows not only herself, but also her partner, to make mistakes. An adult woman knows how to notice her partner’s merits and tell him about it. She knows that a request is different from a demand. And she knows how to both ask and thank. In her speech, the pronoun “I” is heard much more often than “you”. And this is a sign of independence and awareness. Such a woman is responsible for what happens to her and does not shift responsibility to another. If her partner’s behavior violates her boundaries, she will openly tell him about it. Her needs for intimacy, sincerity, and respect are greater than the fear of being uncomfortable and losing the relationship. An adult woman knows that fear is determined by childhood experience. When she is afraid, her inner child, or rather inner children, comes out. There can be many of them - these traumatized, frightened children. They may be afraid of aggression, rejection, loneliness. There are many things they can be afraid of. The more traumas, the more fears. To come to an agreement with yourself means to come to an agreement with your “inner children”. An adult woman knows how to notice and hear her children's needs and realize them. Intimacy in a relationship is accompanied by vulnerability. She accepts this fact and allows herself to be vulnerable. An adult woman knows that if a relationship with a particular man does not work out, she will not be lost, she will not collapse alone. And she will definitely find the strength for a new experience - creating intimacy. Becoming such a woman is not easy. If there was a lot of trauma in childhood, it can take years to heal. And youth is finite. And the childbearing period is limited. What to do? Go into a relationship, allow yourself to make mistakes. The experience of close relationships is created in psychotherapy. And then, gradually, it is transferred to real life, to a relationship with a partner. And one more “secret”. It is impossible to become a woman from whom people do not leave, because two people are responsible for the relationship. The desires and interests of partners may not coincide. And it happens that men also leave the “best” women. You can become a woman who knows for sure that “she has it.” Her value remains with her, even if her partner leaves her. And even if “the whole world” turns away from her. Such a woman will never give up on herself under any circumstances.