“...My son doesn’t do his homework, doesn’t get ready for school or training... I wake you up, I help, remind you, control you. Studies are worse, and we are enemies - he snaps and is rude!” Who responds? Who is tired of doing everything FOR their children, but it’s impossible to let them go into adulthood, as if you’re letting EVERYTHING take its course? Scary to imagine! Yes, it’s scary to stop controlling, it’s scary to face the unknown, to fail, to be called to school, to feel like a loser, a bad parent. Wait, they don’t teach us how to be parents, where do the bad grades come from?? Who dares to put them and somehow evaluate us, criticize us!? We “work” in the field: experiment after experiment, as children grow up and everything needs to be changed again. The situation in the world is changing. With each child again at the desk. Try it and get your bearings! Responsibility is a skill and is not transferred like knowledge. Daily work. And here there is a reciprocal process. We close our eyes in fear and unclench our hands, and the children take steps without us, close their eyes, stumble, fall, get up, but then walk on their own, getting stronger. If we don’t let go now, then how can we let go into life, where they don’t give an assessment, but immediately fine you, fire you, break off relationships? Of course, we don’t immediately stop monitoring; even in production, adults are monitored. But how to leave the stage, how to let go, how to give responsibility to you, specifically to your child - this requires special attention, a detailed analysis. I walked this path with my two sons, where it was very scary. And I took the first step. The children didn’t say, “Mom, go lie down, I’ll do it myself.” No. I looked for options, closed my eyes, let go, observed. Parents create not only comfortable conditions for children, where it is pleasant and joyful, but also conditions for change - this is uncomfortable. This requires effort. But more often parents use violence, which worsens the situation. How to let go? We start with ourselves, with our fears and anxieties. Let's let go inside, it will be easier to do outside. Questions for self-analysis: Do you like helping your child? Is it always? Do you sometimes force yourself to help? Is any help useful? Where is the line between useful help and help that prevents children from growing up? What do you definitely not want to do for your child, knowing that he can do it himself, but you continue out of habit? Write a list. Which point exactly is “stop it, let him do it!”? You are tired of controlling, being a parrot, you don’t know how to stop - I invite you to a free consultation, we will look for the reasons why it is difficult to give control to a child, and we will come up with a plan for reducing control. Write in the comments “need BC”, I will contact you.