Few people like to conflict. Of course, there are both amateurs and professionals who feed on the energy of conflict and savor it. But basically, an adequate person is unlikely to create stressful situations on purpose. No matter how we feel about this issue, conflict in a relationship is simply inevitable. And again, it depends on what you mean by the concept of conflict. For some, breaking dishes and screaming until the morning is normal everyday life or a prelude to an act of love, while for others, a slight raising of the voice and disagreement is already a state of terrible stress. One way or another, this cannot be avoided in a relationship. And the sooner you understand this, the better and healthier the relationship will be. Moreover, if you perceive the conflict not as a reason to break off relations, but as a time to clarify and solve common problems. Absolutely every conflict is not only a place of disagreement, but also necessarily new opportunities! Effective conflict resolution brings people together and helps them act together. Essentially, conflict is a place for growth and intimacy. It identifies bottlenecks in both overall relationships and personal qualities. Let’s give an example. The most commonplace is washing dishes in the family. Each partner has his own vision of these responsibilities. And only at the moment of conflict, if these responsibilities were not agreed upon earlier, will it turn out that the spouses never agreed on such a household detail, but important in every home. Plus, the wife’s claims may not be related to the dishes at all, and only in the conflict are the true reasons determined - fatigue, dissatisfaction, finances, etc. After all, the reasons for all major conflicts in adults lie in their unmet needs or unprocessed traumas associated with development. But if you approach consciously to relationships and to resolving conflicts, then you can resolve them quickly and effectively, while maintaining your integrity and harmony in a couple. Fortunately, in our time there are developed methods, schemes and algorithms that help to understand difficult situations, including conflicts .N. Astapenko, January 2021