From the author: For women who suffer from the need to be an ideal wife. Recently, in a conversation with a colleague, the phrase was uttered: “An ideal wife does not feed her family with semi-finished products.” And I thought. And who is the ideal wife? How is this ideal? This is a woman who succeeds in everything, I emphasize EVERYTHING! And around the house, and at work, and for the children, and for the husband! And everything is perfect! Home-cooked food, cleanliness, happy children, a well-fed husband (in every sense) and a decent job (although the last one may not be on the list, but if there is a job, it must be a decent one, and not just any job). And all by herself! Does this happen? Is this even real? There are only 24 hours in a day. I can hardly imagine a woman who doesn’t sleep at all. There will definitely be a glitch somewhere, and there won’t be enough time for something anyway. Usually on yourself. And after all, such ladies understand everything with their heads. And that you can sometimes relax and eat dumplings. It would be nice to find time for yourself, by cleaning the floor, for example. But they can’t reconcile themselves! What if a neighbor comes by to buy salt? Or will mom come and see the children? And here it is a mess! How hard it is to be an ideal wife! How much effort and time is required. How intense it is! And most often, there is no return! The children don’t help, the husband doesn’t appreciate it, the mother finds something else that can be fixed! It's very hard! This is very sad! I have deep sympathy for you women striving for excellence! How tired you are, sad, dreaming of a break! Dear women, nothing is perfect! Ideality is dead matter! The ideal wife is a robot! Life is possible only when there is dirt and cleanliness, fatigue and rest, disappointments and victories, hunger and satiety, quarrels and reconciliations, tears and laughter... Children can learn to overcome difficulties only when they encounter them, a husband can understand only if he sees or will hear that you need help. Stop. Think about it. Try to answer the following questions: Whose voice tells you that dirty children are a disgrace? Or that a good wife’s family doesn’t eat processed foods? What will happen if you are not ideal? Will this really happen? How will you treat yourself if you stop being an ideal wife? How will others treat you? Ask them, Are your assumptions correct? Often we don’t even realize that being “someone” or “someone” is not our desire, but someone else’s. Sometimes you just need to think about it. Always for you, consulting psychologist Alena Lavrova.