I have experienced many disasters in my life. Most of them never happened. (Mark Twain. 1971/1972) Imagine that you are in a hurry to an important meeting and left the house later than required. The bus has closed its doors right in front of your nose, and the next one will arrive only in 20 minutes. You’ll have to call a taxi, which costs 3 times more during rush hour, but you don’t find any other way out, because you realize that you’re already late. In anticipation of the boss's reaction to your delay, you feel your heart pounding faster, your stomach cramping, you are sweating and feel that your face is flushed with color. You feel anxiety, shame, irritation. Reproach yourself with the last words, which further intensifies the unpleasant physical sensations. In your head, you have already experienced the apocalypse of the most unfavorable and terrible scenario for the development of events, coming to the conclusion that if you were not such a loser, this would not have happened to you. Let's analyze this situation using the ABC model, which underlies rational-emotive-behavioral therapy. A - activating event - you are late for a meeting. C - emotional and behavioral consequence - feelings of anxiety, shame, irritation, self-criticism and self-flagellation. A led to C due to the intermediate link - B - these are our beliefs about ourselves ("If I had not been such a loser, this would not have happened to me"). This ABC model demonstrates the relationship between our thoughts and emotions at the output. To further demonstrate this connection, imagine that 100 people were in a similar situation. Do you think all of them will have the same reaction as you? Of course not, since everyone has different beliefs about themselves. If in your picture of the world and self-image you can be late, make mistakes, be unfocused and this will not speak of you as a bad person or a loser, then in C you you will not experience destructive emotions. Sure, you may feel frustrated or frustrated, but you will be able to process the experience without becoming depressed or socially withdrawn. Where our thoughts lead and how many disasters we experience in our heads can now be clearly seen with the help of this diagram. Our thoughts and conclusions about someone or something are not always rational, just like our emotions. Just imagine how much easier it would be to live, how much more effectively it would be possible to solve current problems, if you set yourself the goal of sifting your thoughts through a fine sieve, changing your worldview and separating the unnecessary and archaic! Painstaking but interesting work. If you have discovered irrational beliefs about yourself and would like to change them, write in private messages or to the specified contacts in the form to sign up for an individual consultation.