Every parent dreams of raising an ideal child. And if you ask about what kind of ideal child he is, most parents will describe a mini-robot with a lot of useful functions, without even taking into account the age of the child. The fact that he has emotions, desires, and his own thoughts is not even worth mentioning. What happens to moms and dads? Why do moms and dads forget that a 90-centimeter-tall man running around the apartment cannot put away his toys on his own? He’s just a two-year-old kid, and he should throw toys around the apartment, and not sit at a textbook and solve problems for the first grade. And this is not a fictional story, but a real request to a psychologist: “What’s wrong with my child: at two years old he solved problems for the first grade, and at 10 he became a bully, and it is impossible to cope with him.” That's the trouble: you should have been misbehaving at two years old, and solving problems at 10. Before making complaints to your child on this or that matter, remind yourself how old he is. When psychological counseling, the psychologist always asks how old the client is, what happened to him at one age or another. Most of us have taken a test at least once in our lives that determines our chronological, biological and mental age. Age is a very important component when starting to learn a particular skill. Age is the starting point for identifying the norm in both mental and physiological aspects. We are always interested in a person’s age in almost any situation: we hire a person, go on a date, look for a partner to do things together. It is important to remember that up to 7 years old, the largest gap between age possibilities is. And you cannot demand from a one-year-old what a two-year-old child does, and comparing with a five-year-old is the same as comparing a prehistoric person with a today’s programmer. It is important to remember and understand that each person has his own speed of development, that development is not smooth, more often it occurs in spurts. You shouldn’t terrorize your own child for what your neighbor’s child is already doing at the same age. And even more so, you shouldn’t tell your child words like “Your brother already knows all his letters at three years old, but you can’t read at five, and neighbor Vaska can’t read.” I went to second grade at six.” And we don’t know what’s happening to Vaska, but we behave completely unworthily towards our children. There can be many options, and if your child doesn’t read Pushkin’s “Onegin” at the age of three, then maybe he just doesn’t like Pushkin, he It’s not clear what we’re talking about there. But about Agnia Barto’s ball, he understands and is close to him, because he knows what a ball and crying are. Recommendation Before you offer to teach your child a poem, try to learn it yourself. So you will feel the syllable yourself. Gradually make the task more difficult. Don't lower your child's self-esteem. When teaching any skill, it is important to follow the rule “from simple to complex.” Taking into account the age and needs of the child, you will not only allow him to learn to understand the world around him and create motivation for cognitive processes, but also will not cause your own child to become neurotic (increased anxiety , various psychosomatic manifestations).The next stage in the desire to make a child “successful” is the moment when the child begins to be overloaded. If a child does well at school, goes to a music school, gymnastics, and you have a desire to get him a math tutor (and you have a very good motive - to enroll in a good university), do not make unambiguous decisions. Remember that he is a teenager, and not only your opinion is important to him, but also the opinion of his peers. There is a lot of negative hidden in the desire to go against the parental will. Recommendation Remember that a teenager under your leadership will make the best choice, and under your pressure he can act out of spite and contrary. Yes, he can do stupid things. Youth is needed in order to make, among other things, stupid things and mistakes - this is how we learn and gain experience (I don’t!