Many women now often complain that real men have disappeared, that modern representatives of the stronger sex do not have independence, responsibility, so that, as they say, to be behind their husbands, like behind a stone wall. The walls are unreliable, you can’t build a good house. And only one thing the ladies forget is that they lay the foundation themselves. It just seems that some other women are raising worthless sons, so that later they will turn out to be the same men. In fact, most mothers with their own hands create from their “relatives” men with whom they themselves divorced or did not want to live together. A tired woman comes home from work, dragging heavy bags, stopping at the store on the way. “Well,” I ask, “are you working so hard? Is there really no one to help? “Yes, there is someone,” he answers. - Two sons at home. One is twenty-seven years old, the other is thirty-one years old. They're buried in their computers, they can't get out of it. Now I’ll come, they’ll start climbing through the bags and grabbing them on the run. If only they got married or something... Everything would be easier...” It’s hard for herself, but will it be easier for another woman? Have you invested love, care, and respect for women into your sons? But then, most likely, future daughters-in-law will be reproached for not looking after her hulks well enough... Another friend tells how she hangs thirty pairs of socks around the house when she does the laundry for her two high school students. “But,” he complains, “they can’t cook their own dumplings.” And if you treat your child not as a weak and helpless creature (and all his life), but as a little man already from infancy, maybe he will develop an attitude towards his mother not as a servant, but as a close person who needs help ? By their attitude towards their sons, mothers show that they themselves do not need support, that children are always weaker. This attitude is formed in children for the rest of their lives. Or here’s another thing: a sixty-year-old mother lives in a three-room apartment with her children. Everything would be fine, only her two “boys” are already under forty. And everyone has a family. Second. All rooms are divided, full communal apartment. But it doesn’t seem to bother the mother much. After the death of her husband, she turned all her attention to her children. Constantly being in their company, being aware of their problems and, naturally, resolving them at the right moment, as it seems to her, has become a vital necessity. In an effort to tie the child to herself, the mother interferes with the development of her sons. By suppressing their independence, she suppresses their masculinity. It’s not for nothing that these “boys” have powerful and strong-willed wives. They cannot imagine another female image. And there are often situations (I know from my own experience as a head of a personnel service) when mothers literally bring their sons by the hand to an interview. This looks rather ridiculous, considering that the applicant, as a rule, is no less than twenty-two years old. The recruiter doesn’t have to ask anything else - the candidate’s independence is obvious. In the same way, mothers decide for their sons where they should study, when to receive a rank or category, and what to do with their career aspirations. By deciding for her child how to build his life, the mother deprives him of his will, makes him weak-willed and lacking initiative. A man loses his natural desire for achievement and conquest. Or, on the contrary, he becomes convinced that only force opposes force, and becomes overly rude and aggressive. How to protect yourself from excessive maternal care? Many guys intuitively understand this when they “run away” from home: they go to study in another city, live in rented apartments, etc. And it is right. It is better to hone your independence alone. The main thing is not to forget that once, when his mother was dressing him for kindergarten, the boy said: “I myself.” Perhaps not very consciously, but successful men early begin to understand that “your own opinion is the most correct.” And mothers better turn their attention to themselves, their interests and their man, giving their son the opportunity to follow his own path and make his own decisions. It’s not for nothing that animals usually raise their offspring only until.