Why, having once fallen into trauma, we end up there again and again - at a different age, different scenery, with different people... Only the flavors of the stories are the same. The same feelings arise: abandonment, horror, anger, a sense of danger, grief... - something heavy. Good things probably also repeat themselves, but they don’t go to therapy with this. There is always a starting point of pain. And often we don’t remember it. It can be so deep - in kindergarten, in the history of childbirth, or even in the mother's belly - that it is impossible to consciously get it out. For this we need another person - a therapist. So why? Where do these repetitions come from? While traveling through the world of feelings in search of a solution to the trauma, the therapist finds the wounded child part. This is the lost part of the soul, and the split-off part - the one that was “behind the fence”, and the shadow - can be called differently. Rejected energy. An unlived feeling. It is important that there was no contact with this part. Connections This is an excluded island of experience. (Perhaps this is an isolated island of a neural network in the brain). Just as our soul seeks connections with those excluded from the clan (through the repetition of their destinies: “I am the same as you ...”), our psyche seeks connections with this island of one’s own experience (through the attraction to the rake: “I feel the same as you did at ~5 years old”). This is about the same thing - about the desire to be whole - in the history of one’s own life and family. And if, having survived trouble, having broken off a piece of ourselves, we could go to a new, good experience, it would look like a betrayal. Yourself. For example, the child’s mother strictly told him that he couldn’t keep the change for himself. She said this out of her pains and fears, of course, but at that moment the child sent his part, which knew how to save and have, to the closet: “Sit here so that mom doesn’t get angry.” And then the child grew up and began to waste money. Why is not clear to him. He may go to trainings on increasing income and savings, but... The child from the “closet” tells him: “If you learn to save now, then you will leave me forever. , in order to break the pattern (after all, it is supported by its own energy), and go find this child, unlock the closet. Talk to him. He'll probably sulk at first. Tell him: “My good man, I’m sorry. Let’s go, I’m picking you up. I allow you (everything that was impossible), even if someone is against it.” Say: "Let's go... Let's do this TOGETHER." Saving, for example. The main thing here is not words, of course. Need contact. Restoring connection and returning energy to where it should be. You need to go through pain, resentment, misunderstanding, hope and finally reunion. The therapist here is the one who can and is ready to see the client whole in this place. He also agrees. By resolving trauma, we return ourselves to ourselves. The piece grows back, and the energy increases. It’s good if an adult starts taking care of this child. Especially at first - it will show him (himself!) that he can really do things differently. Go and do something new to build confidence. Do what you promised. If a child was forbidden to play, buy soap bubbles; if they were forbidden to make noise, go yell; if they were forbidden to paint their nails, make a rainbow with sparkles. LIVE. And if this child is already inside - in a safe, warm place where they love - then there is no need for him to lead an adult to the rake field so that, having received a handle in the forehead, the adult will remember him. After all, I already remembered. And he even took it. Then you can go to any other place. Where there is more joy, more warmth, more “possible” - what you really want. And the child knows very well about this :)________ Letting go of a man - work in a group in August. More money, freedom from addiction and your other requests: 905 347 4330 (whatsapp, telegram)